Seasons…

Well, the babies have not stopped coming, and for that I am very blessed!  Exhausted?  Yes, extremely!  But, blessed?  Yes, even more than exhausted!  Please bear with me, as I go through this season and my blog seems seldom updated at times.  I love blogging, but often times, sleep just wins out!  My poor readers, I am so sorry. 

I am reading a wonderful book right now; in fact, it is our new book for Mom’s Bible Study.  Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow has given me a lot to think about.  Dillow talks in the book about the light in which we see and paint our circumstances.  And, before I turn into bed for the night, I felt like I needed to share some of the thoughts in my head on my blog.  I know I have shared before about being thankful.  This subject was brought to mind again tonight.

It would be very easy to complain or feel frustrated about some circumstances in my life right now.  However, I keep going back to something that was spoken over me while I was pregnant with Harper.  It is so sweet to me how even though I serve a big (infinitely so) God, He still cares about the little details in my life.  He knew that I would need this word of encouragement as I raised Harper; and, He picked someone to say it to me at just the perfect time.  What they told me is: “Don’t despise the season.”  What did they mean by this?  Well, the explanation came from the book of Esther, chapter 4, to be specific.  It was so neat- as the Lord often does- because I had been reading through Esther at the time that I was given this word.  However, the person saying it to me did not know that I had been studying Esther.  Basically, they were trying to tell me that even though we go through situations we may not appreciate at the time, there is a greater reason for them.  And, instead of complaining, we need to look for that reason.  Don’t despise, but rather appreciate the season.  I could ramble on go so much more in depth with this explanation and all this word has meant to me, but I will suffice it to say just this little bit.  After all, it has been a busy week, and I am tired! 

It boils down to this though:  We have a choice!  We can despise our season, or we can appreciate it.  How many circumstances has God allowed me to walk through that He has used in my life later that I never could have foreseen Him using?!  I could make so many posts out of that one!  Or, how many times have I been caught complaining about a season, only to really miss that season when it is gone?  Or worse yet, how many times do I complain about my circumstances, failing to stop and look at the big picture that it could be so much worse?  My dad’s trip to Haiti sure did put that into perspective, as did many of my friends and acquaintances who have lost babies lately. 

How does this look on a practical, daily life level?  Well, the whole reason I am posting this is that as I was putting Harper to bed tonight, it didn’t go as easily as I would have hoped or was imagining.  It had been a long day- I had another birth, and haven’t gotten much done or much sleep.  JB normally puts Harper to bed, but wasn’t available tonight.  And of course, as often goes when there is so much to be done and I really need him to sleep, Harper took forever to be put to bed.  As I laid next to him, with my eyes shut wishing he would catch on and do the same, he climbed on me, practiced all of his vocabulary, and poked me in the eyeballs.  I could feel the clock ticking away, and I kept having to remind myself that even though my eyes were shut I needed to stay awake and get things done once he fell asleep.  His vocabulary recitation grew louder and louder, and sleep seemed more and more evasive, I could feel the frustration starting to rise up inside me.  All of sudden, I heard the words, “Don’t despise the season!” in my head, and my perspective changed in an instant.  I had been away from my precious baby and missing him all day.  Although outside my bedroom walls the world waited on me, I decided in that instant that the world could do just that- wait!  It can be very frustrating sometimes that my little boy doesn’t love sleep, and I don’t have the freedom I once enjoyed.  But, much more than that, it is so rewarding to be blessed with a little boy that loves to climb on his mama.  I get to come home and smell his hair, cuddle him and listen to him babble on and on.  One day, I know I’ll go in and peak in on him sleeping in his own bed, the co-sleeping days will be long gone, he’ll be the teenager who then loves to nap, and I will miss these ‘hard’ days and wish I had cherished the season more. 

Therefore, I choose to be content in my circumstances because I am so blessed!  Hopefully this will encourage you, as it has me.  What things in your life do you need to appreciate and view in a fresh perspective?  It is a short season, don’t despise it.